Last weekend I attended church. In and of itself, this is a surprise for me as I do not consider myself to be religious, but I enjoyed it. Why? Because I am now realizing that Church is not just about god, is it about recognizing our lives within a larger context. It is about our connection to each other, and the ‘heaven’ that we choose to experience. Whether that is in the after-life or in our own lives until we part is up to each of us. I related to this on many levels as part of my past definition as being ‘spiritual’ is accepting that we are here because we have a purpose, whether there be a god or not, there is a larger purpose to our existence. One of those purposes that the preacher touched on was how much effort we decide to spend on gaining one’s acceptance. Using religious examples, he then went on to show how even the divine suffer from this anomaly. Why do we pain ourselves to gain a deeper acceptance from those who are not able or not wanting to commit to that level, while we take those of whom we get that level of acceptance from and not take notice? At the end, his point was that the acceptance we seek is already there but it is up to us to recognize this and accept the love of those whom are not capable of the things we seek. In the end, why should we waste effort trying to feel accepted from those who wish not to accept, where all that energy could be applied towards the genuine love and affection that exists in the universe that is already there for us to see?
This example struck me. Much of my life I have done this with members of my family, my friends… and in the end I did not find what I was looking for. It took a life altering experience to break away from this facade of trying to prove to myself and others that I am worth accepting, meanwhile ignoring the things that define me and those who did accept me for all that I was. Why should we put forth this kind of effort towards those who refuse to give anything back? Well for one, we shouldn’t. We just need to accept ourselves for who we are and accept the love we seek from those that have it to give in return.